Malediction

Here’s to the past,

Glass lifted to the forgotten moments,

All the few, precious mornings

Spent loved and loving,

Nourished by passion, fed by desire

And always soulhungry

For the repast promised in your eyes . . .

Here’s to the past,

Quaffing the waters of Lethe now

Instead of the ambrosia of you,

All the sweet, fleeting ‘noons

Spent loved and loving,

Learning the equations of taste and touch

While I studied the lessons of your heart

For the key to my own

And drank deep

Of the nectar of your smile . . .

Here’s to the past,

My toast in memory of summer breezes

Wafting on the far end of the corridors of time,

Still carrying your perfume,

All the deep purple eves

Spent loved and loving,

Smelling the jasmine in your hair,

Inhaling the mathematics of your femininity,

The scent, the halo, the sunset, the shadows

Filling my lungs, filling my lungs

With the incense of your being . . .

Here’s to the past,

Inebriated, seeking solace in the lavender wine

Of memory, respite in the bottom of the bottle,

From these dream-ghosts that haunt my soul,

All the dark midnight hours

Spent loved and loving,

Knowing the sweet taste of your embrace

And loving the knowledge,

Every thought your touch,

Every touch a dream,

Every dream a fantasy, fleeting and soulful

As my mind dripped with liquid revelries of you . . .

Here’s to the past;

The mornings before this forced fast,

My heart rumbling with pangs for you;

The noontimes before this drought

That dried all of my equations;

The evenings not polluted,

Not covered in the dust of distance;

The nights, oh the long, long nights                                             

Before all knowledge of you was taken,

Before all my soul was shaken,

Before I learned how dark my world is

 Without you in it.